Another wonderful day off. I Love having the time to work on things that are important to me…
Today, I think I finished memorizing the 99 names of God (I’m not sure if I missed one of the basic ones). According to a particular religious tradition, there are 99 names (faces or aspects) of the Creator. A person who memorizes these names goes to Heaven. I think I was inspired to read the names because I was interested in learning the different aspects of the Creator, so that when I pray, I can call upon certain qualities that I may need assistance with…
Anyway, I feel great today, and my blog is moving to another level, probably the last for this particular sharing. It is the stage of blossoming. It happens after you have learned to stop crying, removed the drama from your life and gone through all the necessary withdrawals. It comes after you have sat down and decided what truth and righteousness (right – use – ness) means to you and practiced those principals in your daily life and decisions… You have no idea. I can’t believe that I am sitting here typing this blog feeling happy and able. Praise God…
So after all of the stuff is cleared, and there is always more stuff to be cleared, but after you’ve got to a certain point, other things are easy. I think life is like doing the splits. You have to change some things around if you want to do them. You know, don’t eat so much ice cream. You have to get rid of your fat belly and things in the way and stretch out your stiff unused muscles and exercise so that you gain flexibility. Commit to a practice, and finally, one day, you do the splits. But then, that’s not it, because who just wants to sit on the floor doing the splits all day. Now that you know what to do, and now that you are at a certain level of strength and flexibility, you can dance! Go to a ballet class, modern, or jazz, and it won’t take that long for you to catch on. You still have to cut down on the fats and practice, and you still have to be careful to maintain good posture and not go too long without stretching, but you can move on to the creation part of life now. That is where I am. I did the splits today and now I’d like to do some dancing…
A very prominent writer has agreed to give me notes on my script, and I have a meeting with a popular singer, whom I wrote a song for a while ago. There is a man who Loves me and is willing and able to hold my hand and walk with me through this life. I have green juice in my fridge and pink flowers blow in the wind outside of my window. My life is beckoning, and, I don’t want to say it, but I can’t believe this is my life! This is my life now. It is a good life that I like to be a part of…
So now, I learned this morning in my meditations that at some point, you will be able to see your life, all of it, like you are sitting in a glass compartment and your life is right there on the outside of you. This is the crossroads of the giants. Your mind will tell you no, for so many reasons. How dare you cross over when those other people you know haven’t? No, you don’t deserve that. That’s too much. You’re being greedy. Your mind will say, no, you wanted to accomplish everything on your own so that you can say me me me me! I did that! You can’t possibly let a man pay your bills or stand by you and push you into the manifestation of your dreams! Your mind will give you every reason to stop now, and this is the point that you tell your mind to shut up.
This is what I am doing… I am inside of the glass peering at the magnificent possibility of my life, of which I have yet to see the best. I am saying yes, God. Yes. Yes. I know that there are many layers to life. Yes, God, I choose to cross over to the other side now. I even choose for it to be easy. Yes, I know it can be easy. Yes, I allow my mind to change so that my thoughts will be supportive of the new life I am creating and they will fuel my actions so that I demonstrate Your Will. I say yes. Yes to living my best life now. Yes to being a beneficial presence on this planet. Yes to having all of the resources that I need to fulfill my life’s work. Yes, God. Yes to Love and good food every day. Yes to Love. Yes to Love. Yes to giving and receiving a greater Love than I have ever imagined. You have done so much for me. I am in awe of Your Grace. Thank You. Yes. Yes. Yes yes yes…
My will in thee is faith, not fear… Wisdom, not foolishness… Health, not disease… My will within thee is thy awareness of My love for thee; let My will within thee be done. – M.A.W.
Day 64
Say Yes
Good morning. It’s early morning. That good time before people wake up and remember what their lives are about.
I’m feeling really peaceful. My runaway Dream Lover called me this weekend and brainwashed me with his magic words. It seemed different this time, magic seemed possible and his words didn’t put me in a state of debilitating desperation and fear, so we’ll see…
This weekend was so wonderful. I got a quick glimpse of life on the other side of happy and I realize that I’m almost there. The speaker at my spiritual center asked us, “Are you willing to be so great that people might be jealous of you?” I said yes even though I didn’t mean it completely. I’m going to keep saying it. Today I feel like running through these changes instead of strolling. There’s a fire in my feet!
So this weekend, I spent time with an ex-boyfriend of mine. We had a really good time. Deep conversation. He asked me in so many words why I don’t just get with someone instead of waiting for my “knight in shining armor”. I told him that my knight in shining armor was coming, and I actually felt sure about it when I said it…
Later in the weekend I was feeling low because I still had my runaway love on my heart, and I didn’t know how to get him off. Everyone else had just fallen off one way or the other and I had become OK with the thought that I would never be with them, but this one… he was in so deep and I didn’t know what to do about him. So I did what I do when I don’t know what to do. I prayed. I prayed and I told God that I was willing to release him. For the first time, I said that I was willing to accept the fact that he might not be my husband. I was willing to let go of him and accept whatever God had for me. I was sitting in my car in front of a park and literally as I was praying, he called.
It had been several months since I heard from him, but there he was, the same but different… We talked. Like friends. We hadn’t talked that way in quite some time. We laughed. He poured his heart out and his thoughts about me sounded just like my thoughts about him. I thought, “Wow. He’s just as looney as me,” but I didn’t tell him that, because he’s just as sensitive as me too…
My sisters say don’t give him another chance. He doesn’t deserve my Love. He did this and that and didn’t do the other. But I don’t know if Love works like that, on a merit scale. I think sometimes Love chooses you, instead of you choosing it… So, I don’t really care what he did. I know I’m supposed to, and I can make myself all angry and stuff, but I actually really don’t care. He could have been off divorcing his secret wives and it wouldn’t really matter. I forgive him. I was over here releasing my secret loves while all the while telling him I was ready, so it’s OK if his ambitions got ahead of his actions and he spoke too soon. We are not perfect. What is important to me is what he is trying to create now. That is where life starts. Now. That is where Love starts. In your conscious, sincere intention. I remember a line in Jerry McGuire, so beautiful. “I Love him for the man he wants to be. I Love him for the man he almost is.” It is true. We are always evolving, if we want to.
This is how I know I am ready. I choose to be ready, not just for love, but for life. I choose it with all of my heart, I trust in it, and I am committed to it, so there is no way I can be hurt now. I know I sound crazy, but I understand it now. I am interested in doing only what’s best for me and what is best for me is that I be with someone who helps my heart rest and my womb sing. What is best for me is that I be with someone who treats me like a Queen and honors me, someone who puts me first and someone who proves himself trustworthy, so that my heart and my body will feel safe with him. What is best for me is that I be with a man who knows how to navigate the world, or is at least interested in learning, so that I feel like I have a capable partner. A man who I can pray with, go to the club with, pick up and go anywhere with, and raise happy children with is what is good for me; someone who can get along with my family and someone who will forgive me again and again (for real) when I do things to upset him. Someone who will give me second and third chances to become a new woman over and over again. What is best for me is that I be with a man who trusts God. My brother was right after all. A smart, strong, and brave man. A man who is not afraid of gangsters anywhere in the world.
This man is the kind of man that makes me want to get up in the morning and do some yoga. This is the man that makes me want to write poetry and be strong. It’s important, you know, that we wake up next to someone who helps us to be our best… My runaway man says he’s all that and a bag of chips. He’s pretty bold and funny… I’ve finally learned something in all my man wars, so I tell him to put his money where his mouth is. I am only going to do what is best for me. He says he will and he is, so OK. I give him the opportunity to be different this time around. I think he’s strong, so I know he can be the man he wants to be, so I’ll hold that space for him. That’s what people do when they Love you. Wow. I am actually making a clear-minded non-desperate decision to Love a man on purpose and be committed to him. I haven’t told him all of this yet, but I am building a nest in myself, for him or whoever fits the above description, but for now, its him unless God inspires me another way. I’ll be that woman who they talk about for forgiving again and again. It’s OK. He can’t hurt me anymore. I have learned to trust in God and not in men and so I trust that God will lead me the right way as long as I walk in the direction that I am led. Let Love come as it will, through whom it will. I am open. I am open. I am open… Ameen.
Day 63
Open Up
It’s 3:25 in th emorning. I love this time of morning. It’s quiet and peaceful. Some of my neighbors have their lights on. I wonder if they are up too, making love, contemplating, cleaning up, doing work…
Today I turned in the first screenwriting submission that I have turned in in over two years. I actually spent time with my little sister and enjoyed her company. I had an amazingly great day at work, and I made a business decision which was in my best interest. I think I’m finally learning how to get along on this planet… hmm…
After you have done all that you have to do, after you find yourself sitting in a place of discontent, after you have gotten off the bed, after you have given it all up, you get to make a choice. You get to learn from your mistakes and maybe, if you can get over your ego and admit that, yes, it is all your fault, you get to do something about it. Just a small thing starts miracles.
This is the simplest, most profound secret. In our choosing, in our action, starts the process of creation, and the process begins no matter what you do, as long as you do something. Say a prayer, go for a walk, write a blog, finish the smallest of projects, say hi to a stranger, decide to do a kind act, say sorry, break up with someone, get back with someone, forgive someone, decide to no longer give yourself to someone who is harming you… they are little things, but in them is the power of birth.
Today I decided to trust my instincts and do what was best for me, even though it might have hurt the feelings of someone I love, and in that simple decision, the decision not to give an idea that I value to someone without protecting it, I feel pieces of me coming back. Literally, my body and brain feel like they are saying, “Thank you. We’ve been waiting for you to stop being a dud.”… I release the need to try and please others and I allow myself to be surrounded with people who like me as I am. Can you imagine? Maybe you can, but it is a great life shift for me.
I am learning. I am learning to be happy. I am learning to be truly brave. I am learning to trust trustworthy people and I am also learning how to communicate with compassion. And as I learn these things, it is becoming easier for me to be nice, which is actually my natural state of being. It is easy for me to be nice, because I surround myself with people who I trust won’t hurt me. What a concept! I don’t have to be angry anymore. What a relief. I don’t have to be guarded because I can be around people who accept me as I am. And I don’t have to be afraid anymore because I know that my joy, my prosperity, and my salvation are not dependent on any human being, but are strictly dependent upon the decisions that I make and the direction that I set my attention… Wow. I can be myself. I am learning to be myself… What a life!
Day 62
Learn From Your Past
I have done this one before but it is one of my favorites. Woke up early today so have a chance to sit still before I go in to work.
So thankful. I am alive. So thankful I am sane. So thankful my body is healthy and my fingers and eyes work. So thankful I have so many people to Love and so many people who Love me. So thankful I can go and earn some money today, which will then enable me to buy green juice, pay my rent, and travel places. Thankful for this one day out of many days out of a lifetime out of many lifetimes that I can sit still and remember that this existence is a blessing. Thankful for this day that I am not sad, I am not crying, my mind is at peace and my heart is not aching. Thankful that the worst has passed. Thankful for the car that I am using to go to work. Thankful for the money to buy gas.
Thankful for all of the help that I am not aware of. Thankful for the guidance that has been provided for us through books, messengers, and our own inspiration and instinct. Thankful that God is for me and not against me. God is for me and not against me. God is for me and not against me. With this knowledge I start my day.
Ameen.
Day 60
Give Thanks (Again)
Closet cleaned. Clothes folded, ironed, hung up and packed. All clothes. Not used to seeing such organization. A miracle in my world, really…
It seems like such a big deal to finally complete things. Breaking old habits and getting used to new stuff can be daunting, even if the new stuff is good for you. We have been conditioned to keep our sanity by establishing and maintaining habits…
So, I welcome the breakdowns now. They don’t last forever (I hope). Let the new habits begin.
There are a few things I want to talk about today so I haven’t figured out the heading yet, but it will come before I’m done writing. I’m floating in the in-between. Not particularly inspired or uninspired. Not happy or sad. No big drama going on in my life. I mean, I could keep the thing with my sister going, but I don’t really want to. I have money in the bank and green juice in the fridge. My mamma loves me and my sister does too, and I really don’t have anything to complain about.
I mean, sure, the friends and man thing aren’t ideal, and the professional thing isn’t quite where I’d like it to be, but those things seem easy to me now, instead of seeming impossible. I don’t know why they seem easy, because they are still the same things that seemed difficult a couple months ago, but it has been my experience that when things seem easy for me in my life, they are easy. Perhaps I have finally gone mad. That’s even all right with me… lol.
Anyway, moving forward. I’d like to talk about enemies today. Well, I don’t really want to talk about them, but it seems like a necessary evil (get it? ha ha). I’ll keep it brief. Enemies exist. I have been in denial about this for some time, but the truth is, there are people and forces who wish to harm you whether or not you have done them any harm, but especially if they feel you have done something that goes against their program.
This could be anything, like being with a man they want, or just being with a man period (which makes them feel jealous and inferior). It could be the fact that you are happy (wealthy, at peace, successful, good-looking, funny, smart, Loved) and they feel like they aren’t. Maybe you dumped them or passed them over for a job or position and bruised their ego or shook their concept of themselves. It could be that you are a certain race or religion and you don’t think that the people who feel like they are supposed to be superior to you are superior to you. It could be that you grew up in a certain environment where people weren’t doing well, and then you had the audacity to leave and/or change your way of life and the folks you grew up with take it as an insult. They want to be the most or best whatever and will go to great lengths to destroy you if they think you are better than them… This is a hard pill for me to swallow, but it’s real. No matter what you do, how nice you are, how much money you give them, how many positive prayers you send in their direction, there will be people who just don’t like you. They may even hate you and try to harm you. Look at Beyonce, the pope, the president, religious leaders, amazing teachers, healers, doctors and scientists, they all have people who hate them for various reasons. Even Mother Theresa had haters! What makes us think that everyone is going to like us?
Yesterday, a friend of mine brought to my attention that many of my close friends have also been my enemies, meaning that they don’t wish good for me. I mean they would probably save me if they saw a bus about to hit me, but they would be the same ones to push me in front of the bus under certain circumstances. It’s really not something I like to think about… But what to do?
Different people have their own opinions… There are all kinds of ways to respond when someone wages war on you. I think its important to be aware of what is going on and then make a conscious decision on how you want to respond. Recognize the people in your life and evaluate your relationships… Some people can Love their enemies so much that it changes their enemies’s hearts. If you can do that, go ahead. But lets be honest. Many people want to be like Jesus and other prophets, but they are no where near that level of consciousness and power. What we can do in the meantime is just not hang with the people who wish us bad and say sorry to the people we have harmed. Seems simple enough.
The truth is, if you choose to, you can make a decision to trust people who have demonstrated that they are trustworthy. You can come close to people who have shown that they like you just the way you are. You can share your secrets with friends and family who have shown that, even if and when they are not doing as good as or better than you, they have your best interest at heart. There is no need to hang out with people who want to harm you, and there is no need to go about trying to harm them. It just keeps the drama going, and more often than not, it produces a negative effect on your life… I’m just realizing this. Don’t keep your enemies close. Keep them far away…
Day 59
Beware Your Enemies
Last night. Great night. Talked to mom. Love mom. Exceptionally genuine, kind and giving woman. Sure she has her own issues, but at the root of it all, she’s pretty amazing. Glad and proud to call her my momma.
Emotional. Fighting sister. No big deal. Over it. Sigh… Got to talk to her. Hard to do. Do it anyway. We love each other. Fighting over nothing is dumb. Need peace in house now. Get over it… It’s OK to be loving with the people you Love.
Men. Loved. Them. All. Cool to see the different directions that we have all grown towards. We are all still growing. No need to hold on anymore. No need to try and build-a-man either. They can be exactly as they want to be. They can be exactly who they want to be. Trying to change people is exhausting…
This time has passed. Sad time is gone. Going through a bit of withdrawal, I know, but the attachment to sadness is gone. I’m not depressed anymore. I would rather fold my clothes than lay on the bed. I would rather make peace with my sister than try and teach her lessons. I would rather be single than be in relationships that I’m not 100% sure about. I’d rather be happy now. It smells better.
So change is a process. It starts with a thought and then a commitment (whoo, scary word), and then an action that is in alignment with your commitment and then continuous actions that are in alignment with the decision you’ve made. It’s funny because when you are going through changes, you can change yourself, but you can’t make the people around you decide that they want to change, too. They may like where they are, or they may just not be ready to make moves and I am learning to let people be who they are.
I used to tell my students, “worry about yourself and you’ll be just fine”. It’s true. Just do what’s good for you. Not in a selfish way, although the concept seems selfish. Being good to other folks is also good for you.
Today is a good day. The best day I’ve had in a long time, and it hasn’t even started. I know that everything is going to be all right. I mean, I don’t think it, I don’t feel it, I know it. I allow myself to have this peace. I allow myself to have this Grace. It doesn’t even matter to me, whether I think I am deserving or blah blah blah. The mind is a jokester and I don’t take him seriously. He’s got all kinds of tricks to keep your attention here and there. There is a power higher than the mind, higher than the emotions, and if you can reach that power, the rest is a piece of cake.
I am getting in touch with that power today, call it what you will. It is there whether or not you think you can. It is there whether or not you are feeling good or bad. It is there if you stay on the bed or if you clean out your closet. It is there even if you don’t think you are good enough to have it. It is called Grace, Mannan. It is an attribute of the Divine and it is ours for the having…
Day 58
Accept Grace
So, I wrote a very long blog this weekend. I just looked at my page and see that it wasn’t published. I don’t know what happened to it, but I guess it just didn’t make it. Oh well..
Can I talk to you for minute? I am having a moment. I’ve been talking to a lot of people who are having a lot of negative relationship issues, and that, along with my own stuff, has got me feeling a little down.
I got dumped the other day, and this is new for me. I never get dumped. Well, technically I didn’t get dumped because I wasn’t in a relationship, but this guy I was hanging out with gave me an ultimatum: either I take our relationship to the next level or keep it stepping. I was like, what? I don’t understand. When we initially met, he didn’t want anything. Just wanted to “go with the flow”, “see what happens”, etc. Now all of a sudden he wants me to cook for him and only him and call him special. Sigh… I wasn’t feeling like cooking for him or putting him in that special boyfriend space, but I liked spending time with him. He wasn’t feeling the friendship thing, so I’m keeping it stepping, but wow. It kind of hurts. At least I know that my heart still works…
Another one of my friends dumped me the other day, too, for similar reasons… It’s ok, I guess. Sigh…
So tonight I’m sitting up and I’m writing because something hurts. I mean, I said I wanted a man and I didn’t want to be hanging around with a bunch of guys that liked me if I didn’t like them like that, but it’s easier said than done, because I don’t have a man right now, and I’d like to share love with someone…
So what to do? I could continue to meet new guys that I know it won’t go anywhere with, hang out until they pressure me for a commitment and then dump me when I won’t make one, and then do it all over again with another guy, or I can do something different… But what?
I just took a moment to sit still. It helps. I see that it is good that my friends dumped me. They are helping me to be in alignment with what I said I was going to do: only date folks that I think I can mate… It’s easier to do in theory. At times I become afraid. Afraid that I’m going to be this wildly successful woman with no man and no children. Afraid that maybe something is wrong with me. Afraid that I am engaging in wishful thinking and I should do like most people and pick someone that I can get along with. Forget about the magic.
The problem with forgetting about the magic is that when you forget about the magic, you forget about the magic. I have tried to pretend that there is nothing magical about life for a long time and at times I have forgotten, but my heart just won’t let me, so call me weird, call me different, strange, unique, crazy, whatever. I have to be who I am.
So I’m going to sit this one out. I mean, I’m going to stop trying to talk myself out of what I am experiencing. It hurts. To want a thing and not have it at the time that you want it. It’s scary. To know that you may never have what you seek. It’s downright paralyzing. To think that you may refuse men who you don’t feel “connected” to, do all the praying in the world, lose or gain weight, clean up your house, finish your projects, keep an open space, and still not end up in a satisfying relationship.
But what other options do I have? Continue doing what I’ve been doing? It’s not working… So, I know what I’m going to do now. I’m going to deal with it. I’m going to sit with the pain of not having the life of my dreams right now. I’m going to face my fear dead in it’s big, empty eye. Maybe I will never have what I seek. I am going to do everything that I never did because I thought it might not amount to anything: I’m not going to hang out with folks I don’t feel connected to. I’m going to pray, stay in shape, clean my house, finish my projects and keep an open space in my heart. Why not? I’ve never done it before, you see. I’ve talked about it. I’ve read about it. But I’ve never been about it.
Sh*t is scary sometimes. Sometimes you cry. Sometimes you don’t know how it will all end up, and if you make a major change in your life, there might be some chaos in the meantime. You might find yourself alone for a while. Deal with it. Just deal with it
This I know to be true. Anything is possible. God is for me and not against me. I am stronger than I think I am. Help is everywhere and I am Loving and Lovable. Knowing this, I can handle the rest.
Day 57
Deal With It.
I have a lot on my mind today, so not quite sure if I want to write about my personal life or other things.
Changes are taking place. Decisions to be made. I finished my script. I have to decide if I’m going to go out of the country in the near future and make some quick plans if I am (or even if I’m not). I’m going on a date with a new guy today, the first new guy I’ve been out with in six months. My ex who I dreamed of actually contacted me shortly after I had that dream of him. I hadn’t heard from him in years but he emailed me and let me know that he is shacking with his baby mamma, they have a new child together, and he wants me to get back with him so he can live again… That doesn’t even sound right as I’m writing it.
When I was younger, my brother used to tell me that if I wanted to find a good man, I had to stop hanging with all my guy friends. I actually understand that today. The truth is, I had to stop hanging with all my guy friends who were trying to be more than friends. There’s too much mixing going on and you just end up mixed up.
I can’t imagine trying to get with a guy so that I can save him from the unhappy relationship he is in and maybe win him over from another woman who probably smells like him because they have been so intimately involved. Why would I do that? Why would anyone do that? I’m a little embarrassed to say that I have done similar things before. Why?…
Our mothers tried, but they could not teach us a thing that they didn’t know: how to pick good men and sustain healthy relationships. They taught us to be strong women. They told us all of the evil tricks men play in the hopes that they could protect us from getting hurt. But we never learned how to pick out the good ones and decide what types of relationships we are trying to create. We never learned how to trust our bodies and honor our instincts. We never learned to take time to know what makes us live. We had never really seen healthy relationships, so we thought there was no such thing as a good thing. Well, we didn’t think it, but we felt it.
Now here I am trying to relearn everything. In my silence and in my non-relating to men, I have become comfortable with the feeling of a clear conscience. I know what it feels like to feel good now, and so it is easy for me to recognize when I am not feeling that way. It is easy for me to tell if a man has my best interest at heart and I am learning, oh my God, to be patient and only to engage in relationships that are mutually beneficial or at least not detrimental. As a friend of mine stated, “if you can’t lift another person up, don’t let them bring you down.”
We never learned to ask the simple question, “is this good for me?”. Well, we asked it. We knew certain things weren’t good for us, but we didn’t think we could do any better, and so we told our inner voices to shut up, and we did what was bad for us. We kept telling our inner voice to shut up so that we could “get by” in the world and one day it actually did.
But your inner voice never stays quiet. So now, my ex is contacting me because his heart itches and it wants to love. I am glad he is coming back alive. But now I have to ask that simple question that I have come to love, the question that changes your life when you ask it and act on the answer. Is this good for me?
Have a beautiful day.
Day 56
Do What’s Good For You
I’m up before the sun again. This time of day is so invigorating and peaceful.
I was going to go to my spiritual center today, but I think instead I will make my actions a demonstration of the things I learn there today. I didn’t finish that last 14 pages yet. In my zeal and zest yesterday, I stayed up for a whopping 40 hours straight cleaning, cooking, etc. and then I crashed and spent most of the day sleeping. So I am well rested now and I know it will be done.
This is going to be good, this experiment with life. I woke up today with a lovely text from my mom. I haven’t told her about any of these blogs yet. I was scared. She might not approve of me exposing myself to the world. She might get sad if she knew all of the internal things I had been through. She might ask me why I would do such a thing… She’s going on a major spiritual pilgrimage at the end of this month, though, so I will tell her right before she leaves… lol.
I was talking to my sis about my past last night, and I went online and found a pic of the woman that the first man I ever loved cheated on me with. She’s still pretty. My first love was much older than me and she was much older than him. I was eighteen when I met him and he always used to compare me to her and tell me how I wasn’t mature and I wasn’t “a woman”. He also used to tell me how much he didn’t love her… Right now I am the age that she was when they had their affair. I wonder if she saw my pic and thought I was young and pretty. I wonder if she found someone that would Love her for real. I wonder if he ever stopped cheating and got it together… I remember being 22 and thinking “why me?” Why did I have to love him? I cried and cried and went through all the motions the people do, but then I got over him. And life went on.
Ahh, so I do have something for today. Life goes on. He has grey hairs now. She has a beautiful son from him. I am a writer in California and one day I will marry a man who Loves me for real and won’t cheat on me. A man who doesn’t think I’m too immature or too old and a man who can appreciate a good thing when he has it. For a while, I thought that I would end up being an old maid, but that’s not my lot. God is a good God and I have too much love to give.
I’d like to share a story with you this morning. I didn’t write it, but I like it.
“A man found a cocoon of a butterfly. One day a small opening appeared. He sat and watched the butterfly for several hours as it struggled to force its body through that little hole. Then it seemed to stop making any progress. It apeared as if it had gotten as far as it could, and it could go no further. So the man decided to help the butterfly. He took a pair of scissors and snipped off the remaining bit of the cocoon. The butterffly then emerged easily. But it had a swollen body and small, shriveled wings. The man continued to watch the butterfly because he expected that, at any moment, the wings would enlarge and expand to be able to support the body, which would contract in time. Neither happened! In fact, the butterfly spent the rest off its life crawling around with a swollen body and shrieled wings. It never was able to fly. What the man, in his kindness and haste, did not understand was that the restricting cocoon and the struggle required for the butterfly to get through the tiny opening were God’s way of forcing fluid from the body of the butterfly into its wings so that it would be ready for flight once it achieved its freedom from the cocoon. Sometimes struggles are exactly what we need in our lives. If God allowed us to go through our lives without any obstacles, it would cripple us. We would not be as stong as what we could have been. We could never fly!
I asked for Strength… And God gave me Difficulties to make me strong.
I asked for Wisdom.. And God gae me Problems to solve.
I asked for Prosperity…And God gave me Brain and Brain to work
I asked for Courage….And God gave me Danger to overcome.
I asked for Love…And God gave me troubled people to help.
I ased for Favors… And G0d gave me opportunities
I received nothing I wanted
I received Everything I needed!”
-Author unknown
May God bless you with unspeakable joy, not only in the world to come, but in this world also.
Life goes on. Let it.
Day 55
Life Goes On
hownottocryeveryday 