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Day 424 – Just Like The Movies (All In A Day)

February 10, 2016

Dear You. God. Allah. Jah. I Am That I Am. Mother. Father…
Thank you.
It was like the movies. I prayed to you, and then I had a revelation.
Thank you.
All is well.
I am in Cali for the first time.
Active Cali.
Hustling Cali.
Cali that hurts you so much that it makes you want to be the love that you can’t find.
I am living with friends who want to be the love.
You brought me here. You wouldn’t let me find a room to rent to save my life!
You knew where I needed to be.
I Love You.
Thank you.
You helped me to release the need to fall in love with unavailable men and I’m sure the my presence in My People’s life has helped him much in coming back to you.
I can let go of the pain in the past. I understand why the men I loved were never there for me. My People helped me to understand. It was never about me. It was the feelings and the fear that I awoke in them: feelings that they were not ready to face; fear that they were not ready to confront.
One day, they will dive into the fear and see it for the nothing that it is. One day, Love will pull them forward into the arms of their beloved. I have done my part and I release you, my Loves… Thank you so much for finally making me into a woman.
I am a woman now. Yes. I am. Truly unafraid to show up in the world in the fullness of who I am.
My dad is proud of me. My mom is proud of me. My cousins are proud of me… I am moving around with Grace and Confidence, like you told me to, mom. I still have to work on the confidence part, but I’m getting there. I’m gonna watch some Beyonce videos and practice speaking with my head up and without fear. I’m gonna practice speaking like what I’m saying is true and like I am who I am… I’m going to practice keeping my word to myself… I am proud of me.
I am born again.
You helped me to identify Your voice and to learn to take action that is moving me forward.
You bring messengers. You bring mirrors. You bring signs. You bring help. You bring so much Love. I have seen so much Love. And You are telling me that that is my real gift. Writing is just a by-product. My real gift is my big, Loving heart. Use it and I will never go wrong.
How can I thank you enough?
The sun shines through the windows in my neighbor’s house. This is my family. My other family.
And I will see my sis this weekend. I will be her part-time family, her sister, and give her the space to learn what to do with her new family of choice.
I have done well, You say…

This is just like the movies. Thank You, God. Thank You. Ameen.

Day 424
Just Like The Movies (All In A Day)

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