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Day 281- Ask For What You (Really) Want

January 3, 2014

Good morning World,

I hope all is well. I am well in this New Year. Working today, but just wanted to take a moment to connect. I wonder who all reads this.

I hope life is getting better for you, whoever you are, and I hope you find a little more good in today than you did in yesterday.

People live with me now. I’ve been kind of disoriented for a few weeks now. Not too much progress on my creative projects. Energy really low. Come home from work and just sleep and sleep until the next day. Emotions all over the place dealing with different personalities. Coming back to the world is really something else when you’ve been alone for some time. All these different personalities and energies you come across. So many people doing things for so many different reasons. My mom tells me to be strong, and I remember a time in my life where being strong actually mattered to me, but it doesn’t any more. I am strong by default, but it doesn’t matter to me if people think I am strong or weak. Being at peace is now more important to me than being strong, and so if being at peace requires a show of strength, then I’m all for it.

At work, we have to work now. We have quotas, a number of cases that we have to process every day. The quota is much more than a person can do at an easy pace. In fact, the only way to complete it is if you are very, very rushed and stare at a computer non-stop for hours on end. People are stressed. People are competing with each other now to see who can do the most. It’s an ugly element brought into a formerly peaceful environment. It comes from the leader, who does not believe in peace. She believes in numbers…

I think priorities are on my mind this morning. The world is changing even though I want to stay still. My world is changing. My running buddy and best friend left town for good on New Year’s. I got a new roommate, my sis. My Almost One reappeared on New Years and seems to be trying his best to be nice to me. My favorite coworkers have been transferred to new work locations, so I don’t see them anymore. I have been trying to sit still, but I can’t do it, can I?

It’s time to move around. It’s time to apply for the real type of job that I want, so that when we start working at work, I’ll actually be excited instead of stressed. It’s time to ask for and be with the real type of man that I want, so I don’t have so much confusion in my emotional body. I’ve cleaned up my friendship life, and actually have a few friends here that I truly like, so that’s progress.

I have talked a lot.

I have written a lot.

I have prayed a lot.

I stand on the cusp of a different kind of life. The world will not stand still for me. And You say ask. Once and for all ask for what I really want. Survival times are over. We are out of the negative now, moving through the neutral and into the positive. Our hearts are fully in it now. We are not just going through some motions. It is time to ask and walk. We have found a place of peace within and we are able to carry it with us wherever we go. Have faith and confidence in all the work you have done. Ask for what You want. When will you understand that you can have it? When will you understand that it is for you? When will you realize that this life here doesn’t fit you anymore? There is more for you to do. There is more for you to be. Open heart, open more. Open more. Open more. Ask for what You want and then walk in the direction of your answered prayer. It is time for the doing. You can do it. Do it. Do it. Do it. Survival time is over. You are taken care of. Let Us survive by doing your life’s work now. Let Us thrive by Loving and being Loved to the fullest now. No more half-stepping. It’s OK to be your full, true self.

Let your energy be restored by walking in alignment.

You have found the secret place of the Most High. From here, all asking is True. All walking is Straight. Ask for what you want and live your life now. Now. Now. Now…

Day 281

Ask For What You (Really) Want

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From → The Initiation

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