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Day 270 – Time To Live

November 30, 2013

Good morning World,

I am in Hawaii visiting family. I am so glad I came. So good to be in this vibration of unconditional Love…

My mom and sister are asleep. Kind of. Resting. We sleep in the same room. Spend most of the day in the company of some family member. How have I lived any other way? Wow.

Overwhelmed. Grateful. Grateful. Grateful. Everyone still has their issues. Their constant frustrations and gripes. Their “stuff” they are dealing with in their lives and relationships.

Everyone just woke up… My almost two year-old nephew came in and woke everyone up. He is so happy and animated!!! My blog… I can’t even get mad.

I am happy. I know, in a few days I will be back in LA in my room alone. But right now my sister is making fun of the size of my big toe and we are listening to a video of what the fox says…

I think I won’t be blogging anymore this morning… I left the room for a moment… Back to my thoughts. Ha! Out of the window there is  a view of the mountains and a golf course… It’s beautiful here.

Life can be really beautiful. My family advised me about my situation with “My One”. I never talk to my mom about boys, but I did. I let her in on the happenings of my little world. She was happy to be let in. I was happy to share. My family and my only married sister advised me to just like him. If I like him, just like him and act like it. Be nice to him. Check on him. Be myself. Let God take care of the rest…

What a concept. I talk all this talk, but this is where the real faith stuff comes in. When there is a real risk of being hurt. What if? What if he doesn’t like me anymore? What if he thinks I have too many issues? What if he’s a liar? A player? A thief? A user? What if he’s mean? What if he has a million girlfriends somewhere and he didn’t really like me in the first place? What if he’s just trying to get my goodies? What if? What if? What if?

How do I protect myself against all this and still be open? What if he breaks my heart?

How do I be smart about things this time?

There is no answer. Trust, You say. Trust in all you have learned. Trust in Me. Heed the signs…

I can’t get into this blog today. My family is doing too much. Let me just take a moment to Connect, though, before I get swept into all the things we will do today. All the energies from so many people.

Let me set an intention for the day. Let me set an intention for this man before…

OMG. My mom just came and plopped down next to me. I think this blog is a bust!

Family… I Love them. Let me just give in to this moment. Let me just enjoy the company of others. Let me be with them, now. Let’s try this part. Being in the world, but not being overcome by it.

Loving but not being hurt. Respecting my own boundaries, but still being vulnerable and open. Loving myself. Let’s experiment with all the things I’ve learned…

Day 270

Time To Live

 

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From → The Initiation

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