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Day 223 – The Inner World

April 15, 2013

This one is with my eyes closed…

I found my mojo y’all! It’s been MIA for about a month, but I found it. Don’t ask me how. I don’t take credit for Grace. I only acknowledge being available to receive it.

An encouraging phone call yesterday, from someone on my team. I was considering running to Texas with my one year old. It was a rough day. He had been crying all day. Teething. Rash. Bored. Wanting my attention…

I had competitors for my fundraising party. Someone was doing my exact same idea on a date earlier than me. I’m not gonna say they stole my idea, but oh the irony… I was sinking fast again. Doubting. Fearing. Wanting all struggle to end…

Nothing particularly has changed, except my mind today. I sat still. Just now. Just before writing. I sat still. I prayed and meditated until I could feel Truth. It’s as if there’s this whole other world in our minds and our Spirits. When you go there, or at least when I go there, all things seem possible. Life seems good. I am able to work with a smile.

But I have to keep checking in. I notice the difference when I go more than a few days without prayer or meditation. I get caught up in the outside world. I get swept along with other people’s objectives. I lose all sense of Self and want to run. I feel weak and powerless and confused.

This morning, I went to the well to drink of the Spirit stuffs. The Truth stuffs. The Real stuffs. Is our inside world a reflection of what happens on the outside or is our outside world a manifestation of what goes on in our hearts and minds? I don’t have all the answers, but I know that it makes a difference when you remember. I know that this morning I can go into my day not as a beggar hoping and praying that one day I will be saved, powerless and needy.

This morning, because I have checked in, because I have reminded myself that my life is a good life, I can put my back into my work. I can continue to plan my fundraising event in spite of my competitors knowing that if God puts something in Your Spirit, then He has already made a way for it to manifest. I can move with confidence and so much Love. I can be thankful for everything, and I am thankful for everything and nothing, Allah. This computer, which came as an unexpected gift. The internet that allows me to reach out and touch and share with so many people. A warm and comfy bed and food. My new little companion who follows me everywhere and offers so much Love and Joy and compels me to give and understand beyond my limits.

My clear mind.

The pain that I don’t even remember anymore.

A Loving Heart.

The feeling of Aliveness welling up in me again. Again and again we go to the well. We tap in to our inside Selves and bring out what is good. We tap in to excellence. We find the Truth. And we let go of all that no longer serves the evolution of our soul. We let go of all that no longer supports the experience of Divine Peace and Happiness. We let go of all that is no longer in alignment with the manifestation of our Destiny.

This morning, I go deep in. I come to You again. I relax knowing that my will is Your Will, and so all that I see in inspiration must come to pass. This is my day. I am strong. I am grateful. I am humble. I am Divinely guided. I am full of Joy and I express it. I am Love. I am brilliant and talented. I am all that I am. I am supported and I partake in the Abundance that is around me even now. I give my all. One day at a time. One step at a time. I give all that I am. And I get up again, in Faith… Ameen.

Day 223

The Inner World

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