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Day 169 – Move

October 3, 2012

These past few days have been pretty different than usual. Movement is in the air.

One of my sister’s pressured me to hurry up and organize this “heal the world” venture that I have been speaking of for some time, and before I knew it, I was preparing a proposal for “Project Rebuild” and on a conference call with the village chief of the particular country that I would like to work in… Wow. It’s actually happening.

I have to slow down and catch up. Breathe a little. Things are changing and I know this feeling. I know what change feels like. This is crazy.

So, I”m sitting in the Writer’s Guild library today. I was supposed to start work on a new project today, but I’m too excited. I can’t tell you yet, but one of my other projects actually moved today. That’s film talk, but by “moved” I mean moved forward to another stage of development, like maybe someone called you, or you had a meeting, or you’re talking about contracts, or anything that means the prospects for completion are more likely.

So things are moving. I had to sit real still today and pray like I’ve never prayed before, because things are moving and they have moved before and I wasn’t ready or able or I thought it was too good to be true and messed it all up, and this time, I would like to be able to accept the realization, the fulfillment, Allah, of my dreams coming true.

My dream life is becoming my real life and it’s just happening so fast. You say no it’s not. It’s been a long time coming. I guess it happens like that. It’s a long time coming, but literally, things actually change in one day. Just yesterday, I was crying over dudes and today I can feel the life coursing through my veins… I can feel the life coursing through my veins, y’all. Do you know what that feels like?

I want to share a bit. It feels like water. Pure and easy. It looks like my dad’s big, bold, smile, and it sounds like my mother’s sweet, loving songs. It feels like everything is gonna be all right… I don’t know much, but I know what I know, and today, I know that everything is gonna be all right. I actually know it is. It just is. You don’t believe me, and that’s ok, because I know that my life does not depend on you believing me, it depends on me believing me.

When I leave here, I am going to make a phone call, and after I make that phone call, I am going to go and bless my baby sis with some water and sugar like she likes. I am going to reach out and find someone to go to my spiritual center with me tonight, and then I’m going to go home, put some ads on line, and start packing up my apartment.

God, I don’t know where I’m going, but I am following Your lead, all the way this time. You are my guide, you are my way. I allow all the fear and all the doubt that I have ever experienced to be transmuted and obliterated in this moment. I replace it with faith. I trust. I lean onto The One who created me and The One who created all existence. I declare, I announce and I allow my Life to be a good life. “My Life is a good life… My way is a good way.” Ameen.

Day 169

Move

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From → The Good Stuff

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