Skip to content

Day 18 – Remember Why You Are Here

August 20, 2011

A little over a week has passed since I wrote the post “Be Consistent”.

I have spent the past seven days running around in desperation, trying to find a place for me and my little sis to live. We had found a very nice place, but due to some last minute information from the owner, we found that we would really be straining to afford it at our current income rate.

So, I had been squatting in my apartment for the past week while i scrounged around looking for apartments day after day, until I came home day before yesterday and found that they had changed the locks. Note to self: change the locks before they do.

Right now I’m at my brother-in-law’s house, watching his cat chase her tail…

This blog has helped me to stay focused and now i see why folks recommend that you take some time every morning to pray or meditate or write in a journal. Without setting aside a moment to remember why you are here, it is easy to get caught up and swept up in the drama that is everywhere.

So, I’m glad to be back, and I’ll do my best to continue to write every day. It is challenging, sometimes, to focus on things when it feels like your world is falling apart. I think the catch 22 is that if you don’t remember and recommit yourself then it seems like your world will continue to fall apart.

In the past, this would be quitting time. Time to scrounge around, take the first job i can get, find some man to distract me, put the script on the shelf. I have come to know my destructive patterns very well, and i must say, they have all resurfaced in the past week. Maybe that’s what they call the devil. Your old self, sitting around, just waiting to take you backwards the moment you get off track. Rebelling, in fact, resisting and pulling at you the minute it seems that you are making progress.

This time I won’t give up. I have come here, to this state and this city, to the world, to this place in my development for a reason and the devil can’t stop me now. I’ve come too far…

In us, there is more strength than we can imagine. In us, there is goodness. For us, a good life exists, a true life is possible. Aliveness is not just a word. Thank you, God, for this realization, for this remembrance. Ameen.

Day 18

Remember why you are here.

Advertisements
Leave a Comment

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: