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Day 7 – It’s All Right to be All Right

August 1, 2011

Today was a good day. I don’t believe I cried at all, or even thought about it. I was too busy living.

It’s interesting to me how life can change so suddenly. One day you’re down and out, lonely on a computer with no one to talk to, and in a day, you can meet someone, get a new job, finish a project you’ve been working on forever, find out you’re having a baby, move somewhere else, etc, and the trajectory of your life changes just like that.

Everything is changing for me right now. Really. Everything. I’ll be moving somewhere new in the next few weeks, I am completing projects that have been sitting on the shelf for years and finally sending them out into the world, and I am not worried about anything even though I don’t know how things are going to turn out!!! This is the newest part for me. Maybe I have finally fallen off the rocker indeed…

You know what I’m worried about the most? Life is changing for the better so fast, I am wondering what I’m going to talk about when I’m done talking about all the sad stuff? Who wants to hear about people being happy when they are sad??? What do you do when you are done struggling, fighting, cussing, and punching everyone (including yourself) in the face? How does it feel to actually be able to eat, buy, go, and do anything you would like and be happy?

I know we all say that we dream of being this, that, and the other, but I will be the first to admit that the dream has always been this lofty thing on the other side. I’ve never really believed that I would be one of those people. You know, the ones that do stuff in the world, that love their jobs, the ones who have fulfilling relationships. A part of me has even resented those people and wonders how dare they be so happy when we are all suffering so much. It’s just not right.

It’s a thought to be dealt with. Because how can you get to the other side if you feel like you shouldn’t get there because it’s not fair…

Today I heard a speaker talk about how many of us are not ready to accept our blessings when they come, and so we sabotage ourselves because secretly we don’t believe that we should have or be the things we want to have or be… He suggested that if you would like to make it to the other side, then you work at cultivating a consciousness of acceptance of your good. For me, that means I have to work at knowing and believing that it’s all right to be all right.

I can do that…

Day 7

It’s all right to be all right

  1. H.Riley permalink

    U r right on it ! I can only repeat what u have said we keep getting up doing the work being-easy haven real dreams being alright with our many blessing cause we live we r prepared to move forward every day and YOU help myself & OTHERS to know & remember these things r a real part of living a life where our needs r met ..thank you! LIFE IS GOOD!

  2. The Oba, Christ Follower permalink

    I’ve known you for over 5 years and I never knew that you were going through these struggles. When I see you, it’s been some time, you always exude a great sense of pride and your magnificent smile can blind a man and lift him up from his own bad days. You’ve done that to me, lol.

    I’m glad that your day went well and I’ve read all you postings, it seems like you are making sense of things now. It’s very important that people try to make sense of their traumas and that they even disclose their secrets to a trustworthy person, (I read that in a book).

    I hope that blessings overwhelm you to the point that you constantly feel an abundance of joy. Please continue to try to occupy your time and focus on what is lovely and beautiful.

    Continue to write, write scripts, books, a lot of stuff. Workout, go for walks, and know that you are blessed.

  3. Gopika permalink

    You said what will you do when you cross over to the other side–Joy! Well I think you should write a new blog– one that shows how you are counting your blessings, experiencing the things you wished for yourself, finding joy in the small and large things, and most importantly, about how you took the journey!

    It will come– Joy is only a thought away! Feel the light of Joy enlighten your heart and spread to every part of your body so much so that you are now living in that light, let it expand and feel it reaching and touching your loved ones, so they too are in the light of joy, now let it expand even more to include the earth, planets, universes, and relish in it for as long as you like. When finished see that joy radiating in your heart and Know it is alright to be HAPPY!- if only for a second!

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